Life Coaching

Boosting Your Self-Esteem

Self-esteem isn’t always the same. Sometimes you will feel good about yourself and other times you won’t. This happens when we think different thoughts. When you are positive, you will feel better about yourself, and you will have stronger self-esteem. When you are being negative, this might make you lack self-esteem.

You might look online and find that people post things showing their self-esteem. When things start going well, you will feel your self-esteem change for the better. Having a better self-esteem can help you to have more energy in your life. It can be tiring to have not enough self-esteem and when you learn to improve your life, you will build your self-esteem easily.

Understanding Self-Esteem

Before you worry about your self-esteem, you need to understand that self-esteem and self-compassion are similar, but the problem is that self-esteem can change. When you focus on your judgements against yourself or on how other people make you feel, it can cause you to have less positivity about yourself. This can cause you to value yourself less and have a lower self-esteem. This also happens when you compare yourself with others.

Self-esteem has to do with how you feel about yourself and about the things that you have done. When you are around things that show lifestyles that you can never achieve, it can make your self-esteem lower.

Self-esteem can affect how you feel and the way that you talk to yourself will affect your self-esteem. You might find that you are full of negative thinking but if you are, you need to focus on being more positive and building yourself up.

Try to say positive things about yourself and stop thinking something negative each time that you think of yourself. Don’t compare yourself to others or think that you aren’t good enough.

There is a difference between having a strong self-esteem and having confidence. Your confidence shows you how you see your skills and talents, but your self-esteem relates to the trauma that you have experienced since childhood and how you developed.

Building your self-confidence can help you to improve your tasks and help you to stop doubting yourself and your worth.

Pay Attention to How You Talk

It is important that you pay attention to how you talk to yourself because your self-esteem can fluctuate. Taking care of yourself means that you can increase your self-esteem. You need to notice the self-esteem of those around you as well because if you have people around you that are always talking doubt into their life, you might need to support them.

When you know what areas of your life that you want to do better at, figure out how to better them and build up your self-esteem.

Lowering Self-Esteem

There are things that can cause your self-esteem to lower, and this can be the mindset that you have or even your environment. You need to know what is causing your self-esteem to lower so that you can be more aware.

Here are some things that can lower your self-esteem:

  • Abusive Relationships

If you are in any abusive relationship, then you might find that your self-esteem is lower. This can be a parent, a friend, a partner, or it can be something that happened to you as a child.

  • Thoughts

Thinking positive can boost your self-esteem but when you have negative thoughts, it will make you not feel enough.

  • Life Situations

Life situations can lower your self-esteem. It can be hard to deal with yourself when you wonder if you are good enough in school, in your job or in your personal relationships.

  • Standards

People often base how they are worth on what they look like. If your body image gets lower, it can make your self-esteem get lower.

  • Setting Goals

Don’t set goals that you know that you can’t reach. Setting hard goals can make your self-esteem lacking even if the goals were out of your reach in the first place.

How Does Low Self-Esteem Effect You?

Having low self-esteem can effect your mental health. People that have low self-esteem are hard on themselves. They have challenges and they have a hard time facing them. When they make mistakes, they might isolate themselves from others so that their self-esteem doesn’t fall as much.

When a person doesn’t stand up for themselves then they will often isolate themselves instead of getting out of their comfort zones and this can all be based around low self-esteem.

Low self-esteem can affect your mind, but it can also cause you to have stress, anxiety and to be depressed. Thinking negatively makes it hard for you to find worth in who you are.

Improving Your Self-Esteem

It isn’t easy to build your self-esteem but if you want to live a healthy life, then you need to figure out how to do this. There are different tips that you can try out and find the ones that help you the most.

What Do You Like?

Make a list of the things that you like most about yourself. Write down all the traits that you feel good about. Keep this journal with you so that you can see the good things about who you are, and you can read them each day.

Being thankful can also help you and you can write the things that you are thankful for in your journal. Write down positive affirmations so that you can be more loving of yourself. Notice the negative thoughts that you have and focus on positive things.

Don’t Try to Please Everyone

People that have low self-esteem will often say yes when they should say no. Don’t always be a yes person so that you can please everyone. This can cause you to be overwhelmed and cause you stress.

Be supportive of those that you care about but don’t put your own self-worth on the line for others.

Try Something New

Try to do something new and get out of your comfort zone. You might be afraid to try new things because you are afraid you won’t be successful. Stop thinking this way and be willing to try new things.

Don’t Compare

Don’t compare who you are with other people. There will always be someone better at something than you and there will always be someone worse at things than you are. Your worth isn’t based on how good or bad you are at something or how much better someone is than you.

If you have a hard time looking at social media, then give yourself a break and take time to appreciate your own life.

Forgive Yourself

You have to forgive yourself for your past mistakes and for the things that you have thought or said about yourself. Know that you have weaknesses and be compassionate with who you are.

Set Boundaries

It is important to set boundaries in your life if you want to have stronger self-esteem. You can see that your values will align better when you have boundaries. Think about things in your life and know that people will respond differently in situations. If someone speaks a way that you don’t like, keep your boundaries strong.

You need to set boundaries at home but also at work. Don’t work more than you should and make sure that you have a life and a work balance.

Celebrate Yourself

Celebrate the small things that you accomplish in your life. Talk to yourself in a positive way and get rid of negative feelings and thoughts that you have. This can help you to be more confident and help you to build up your self-esteem.


Get rid of negative thoughts and negative people. If there are people in your life that are always affecting your mood, find other people to be around. People that are always pointing out your flaws, putting you down, making fun of you when you mess up or hurting you can cause your self-esteem to lower.

Find Supportive People

As you learn to improve your self-esteem, there will be times when things get hard. These are the times that you need to have someone that is there for you and someone that can feel proud of you. The more people that you have in your corner that support you, the more motivation you will find.

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